Blog Update

This post might be a one off. Time will tell.

Each of the children are now attending school full time. Lady (now 12) started secondary school in September. It is going well for her. She had been concerned that she would find the work too difficult and didn't fully believe my assertions that she would cope well with everything expected of her. She lacked confidence in her abilities and thought my judgement of her worth wasn't objective enough to trust. She now knows for herself that she is smart, a good learner, flexible, social and far more organised that even I thought she'd be and this has boosted her self esteem. There are aspects of school life that she dislikes and many that exasperate me but the current system means that if you chose the school option, you get these things along with it. Lady is happy and the advantages for her and all of us outweigh the disadvantages so to school she goes.

Thomas (now 8) is in the same primary school he started just after Easter. He is happy too. He is so dedicated and conscientious, he works hard and still loves PE best. Like Lady he had made new friends. His school is across the road from a country train station just one stop away from the station 10 minutes walk from our house so he takes the train to and from school on his own every day. He enjoys the feeling of independence and personal responsibility.

Both of them are still in the gymnastics squad. Thomas left the men's artistic team and like Lady he now does acro gymnastics and tumbling. Lady is also in the cheerleading team and competes in an all-Ireland competition later this month. They are thriving.

Duncan (10) is also at school- one for children with severe learning disabilities so he gets the right level of adult support. I could not be more pleased with the school, his teacher and the other classroom staff. Duncan adores it and talks about it all the time. He tells me about his friends in the class and what they do each day. He is having a total blast. Today he will have gone horse riding for the 2nd time. The report back in his home-school diary last week was that he is a natural and loved the whole experience. He thinks he's Cowboy Woody so here's hoping he doesn't try to gallop off! Not just yet anyway. Every Friday they go swimming. They have had a magician and the Ulster Orchestra to perform for them. They've been on outings to the airport, to sheepdog trials, to the wetland centre and aquarium. Duncan loves going places.

I was prompted to write today to record the meeting myself and his dad had this morning with Duncan's teacher about his individual education plan. His teacher is obviously a perceptive person as she is utterly enchanted by Duncan. She realises he is very capable academically and is keen to encourage and enable him to be the best he can be. She thinks his little animations are so clever-she says that she is convinced that one day he'll be famous! - and that he is such a loving, happy and kind boy. She talked about all the ways they are helping him to progress in his self control, communication and understanding. It was a most positive and helpful meeting. I only just realised that neither of us mentioned the word autism once- we didn't need to. We both know that Duncan's autism is just part of all the amazing, astonishing, at times infuriating and always awesome way that he is so we only needed to talk about him and his environment and how to reduce the barriers he faces to be well.

Here's his latest video.

It's not the reward

Last week after his gymnastics class, Thomas came to tell me that he'd managed to do a back flip without help and on the floor. He was very proud of his achievement. Lady also "got" her back flip (to use their terminology) a few weeks ago. As I'd done for his sister, I shared his joy, expressed my pride in his hard work and hugged his beautiful and strong little body. Later when I was downstairs I noticed a new gymnastics trophy on the shelf. "Oh that," he said easily,"I won it today for getting my back-flip."

I was really happy to see he had taken more pride in sharing the accomplishment of the move instead of the reward, relished the intrinsic satisfaction and not the extrinsic prize. Just getting his back-flip was all the reward he needed.

Wish I'd been less focused on the praise and the prizes when I was his age and I might be less influenced by how I think others see me now.

Trying School

Lady and Thomas were taken by their dad to visit the local Integrated primary school last Tuesday and both liked it so much that they decided they would go to try it out. So after I spoke on the phone with the school principal, we've arranged that they will start this Thursday so they go for a couple of days before the Easter break. I'll be visiting the school myself tomorrow morning to look around and meet with the P4 and P7 teachers to talk about what they do and to tell them about my children.

Lady's decision came as a complete shock; she announced a few days ago she wanted to visit the school with the others. She had previously always been adamant when questioned that she was not at all interested in going back to school for the foreseeable future. But she just realised that she wants to try out primary school again before she's too old. So, fair enough, off she goes.

Thomas has been thinking for a while about going to school for the first time in his life. He'd originally said he'd start next autumn term so we could all enjoy the summer together instead of being stuck in a classroom for the few months we have a year when the weather is half decent. But after seeing the school he changed his mind and wants to go right away.

We're trying to decide how best to arrange how to travel to and from school. It's one stop away from here on the train and they could easily manage to travel there and back together but I have a notion that wouldn't be allowed by the train company; unaccompanied minors etc. They could walk, cycle or use a scooter and go along the coastal path. Or I could copy almost all the other parents and drive them there.

I hope they enjoy this experience. I still think home education is a better way for children to learn; school is so very inefficient and takes up such a huge portion of children's lives, especially when you consider that even after they have spent almost all day in school, they then have homework to do. I don't know how the children will manage all their activities; Tuesday - Thomas has gymnastics then jujitsu, Wednesday - they both do gymnastics, Thursday - Lady has 2 gymnastics classes and Thomas goes to Beavers, Friday - Lady goes to the local youth club and the gymnastics coach told me yesterday she wants Thomas to start a class on Fridays soon, Saturday - Thomas does jujitsu and hurling and Lady has cheer leading, Sunday - Thomas does gymnastics. How are they going to have time to spend with their family, go to school, do homework, continue their sports and activities, play and hang out with friends, chill out and read/watch tv/learn an instrument/master a computer game/draw a picture/write a letter or blog post? How does everyone manage without bursting from the pressure?

I do want them to enjoy it and to gain from the experience. They are free to remain at school if they so choose, but if, having given it a good couple of months, they decide they want to be home educated again then they will be deregistered. This is not now the most straightforward of manoeuvres as some of the education boards are trying to fool parents wanting to home educate that legislation exists (it doesn't) to prevent the deregistration process.

I am keen to know exactly what they make of the whole thing, and think that for Thomas especially, he'll either love it or hate it. I don't expect him to merely tolerate it. Lady only wants to go for one term but she may discover that she wants to go on to secondary school too in which case I will have to try to find a place for her in one of the schools not requiring a pass on the transfer test.

I'll be here for them no matter what and boost them and help them know what they need and how to get it. Duncan and I will have more time together and that's always nice, though he may be going to school some time soon himself. Until he does (if he does) he's going to miss his siblings terribly.

For your viewing pleasure...

It's Duncan's most recent production. The music is by his current favourite singer, Michael Jackson. He likes to listen to his CD in the car and prefers track 1 from Off the Wall.

Sadly my friends in Germany will be denied the joy of watching this random video as Sony Music have blocked it there, boo hoo.

Flipping and cycling

We had a sporty weekend. Thomas and Lady had their jujitsu class after which Lady tried out to join the new competition squad set up by her cheerleading group. Thomas and I watched and she was great. Afterwards one of the coaches I didn't know asked if she'd like to join 2 other squad classes, in tumbling and acrobatics. Hell yeah! She is so keen on her gymnastics and has for ages been hoping that a time may come when she could join a squad. She is very happy and I am proud of her. She will be doing over 7 hours a week of gymnastics and would happily do twice that. Flipping ace!

Gordon got bike racks for the car so we can fit all 5 bikes on and head off to various cycle start points. After lunch we drove to Comber and rode the Greenway into Belfast. It was a beautiful day and there were plenty of other people using the path, causing me to repeat the instruction "keep left" many times, along with old favourites like "slow down Duncan!" and "be careful, don't bump into the people/dog/child" as needed. There are few spots where the cycle path crosses a road so I had to be aware and make sure the boy didn't just ride on out without looking. It went well though. We did have to divert off the path to buy drinks for thirsty children as I'd left our own bottles in the car. But we made it all the way to Belfast.

Our final destination was McD's in a shopping centre. Duncan made another diversion into an electronics shop where he'd previously spied a Sonic PC game. The child never forgets. I allowed him to buy it and then we had to get to the (ahem) restaurant. Gordon and Thomas had gone on ahead (loo emergency) and I couldn't see where to go. Thankfully the curly haired sat nav that is Duncan took the lead. There was a hairy moment when he rode in front of a car pulling out of the carpark, thankfully it was going very slowly but it made me scared for a while and I stuck even closer to him.

We all went in, ordered and ate. Duncan sat and had burger and chips, interspersed with mouth fulls of ice-cream. It was, to use behaviourist speak, very good sitting. Clearly getting him well tired out is the key to family dining in public. He got a bit fed up by the end and shouted a little about something or other, certainly nothing too unusual given the generally high screaming child background noise of our location, but two girls in the booth next to us seemed to find it, to use Thomas's favourite word, fascinating and stared constantly.

The journey back was even easier as there were fewer people on the path. Lady and Thomas were marvellous as always, just got on and had fun. Duncan and I were last back. He was very pleased with himself, telling me that he was the fastest, the strongest and the proudest boy on the bike path! It was all very nice, but my backend hurt!

Next day I was lackadaisically lolling around as is my right on a Sunday when I remembered Lady's acrobatics class. We dashed off in the car, as fast as possible when the car was laden with bikes, and drove to the gymnastics hall. Sadly silly me hadn't looked at the timetable properly and I was at the wrong place. Lady was nervous about the new class and stressed at being so late. We got to the right place and she didn't want to go in at first but thankfully she changed her mind and really enjoyed the more advanced class. I am delighted that she has such a strong interest in a sport and that her persistence and effort is paying off.

As I write, Thomas is practising the splits on my bed wearing his band new leotard and shorts combo and he looks so adorable. He had a haircut on Saturday, had to be done since he'd tried the DIY approach and now it's really short. It suits him though. His gymnastics class is on this afternoon, and after that, Lady's first tumbling class. I'm going to be doing even more mum-taxi jobs than before. It's a good job I don't have the school runs to cope with also or I'd have to move into the car full time.

Feeding all the senses

Duncan just laid out the flour, cocoa powder, sugar, eggs and butter out on the kitchen work top. He then set out a bowl, measuring scales and a wooden spoon and requested that I help him prepare a chocolate cake. We have been making a small, reduced sugar confection that can be cooked quickly in the microwave and which he loves. I don't, but then, that's an advantage as I'm not so tempted to munch it down myself. Duncan's recent desire to eat chocolate cake stems from a clip of the film Matilda that he watches regularly.



Duncan likes to eat his cake like the talented Bruce Bogtrotter, enjoys seeing chocolate sauce smeared over his face in the bathroom mirror and has even be known to hold his empty plate over his head when he's finished. He has also gained some useful new expressions thanks to Miss Trunchbull; disgusting criminal, scrumptious and sweat and blood being among his latest acquisitions.

Last night I cooked some chicken. Duncan ate 3 pieces while watching a 2008 BBC Olympics promotion film Lady showed him recently.



This is why. He wanted to see the chicken-eating pig while he himself ate his chicken. This happens often. Many of the food he eats in his (thankfully) forever expanding diet are items he was inspired to try after seeing them on a film. He eats corn on the cob, having seen it on Home on the Range. He eats spaghetti, thanks to Lady and the Tramp. Oxtail soup is a favourite because of Ratatouille, porridge came from various editions of Goldilocks and the 3 bears. He often sets the appropriate clip going as he eats the particular food it inspired.

I must see if he'd enjoy Popeye. he could do with more greens.

(Anne C has written a few good posts recently about food and eating, starting with On The Feeding of Quirky Mammals, Part 1.
Gonzo has started a new food blog. Perhaps Duncan will contribute a recipe some day.)

A Good Friday

This has been a good Friday so far.

Right now, Lady is at the cinema with 2 friends. They're watching Race to Witch Mountain. Duncan is at home with me. He's getting changed. Today he dressed up as Donald Duck by putting a pull-up nappy over his pants to create a nice bulky white bum, and wearing a blue T-shirt with 4 cardboard "buttons" stuck on with tape. A couple of days ago, he and I were in town with the girl who lives next door. We'd dropped the others off at gymnastics and were on our way to the charity shop to buy videos. Then, Duncan was dressed in a new long, navy dressing gown, short green "Peter Pan" trousers, wellies and a back-to-front blue cap and carrying a torch. He was, as will no doubt be obvious, Professor Ludwig Von Drake. Our neighbour, rather admiringly described his look as "extremely random." She's a great girl.

Last seen in an Irish town, bowing graciously as he went.

Thomas went to work with Gordon today. He called me to tell me he'd been all around the labs and seen a cell under a microscope and wanted one of his own. A microscope that is. He wanted to figure out how many cells we each have and then about how many cells are in all the people in the world.

Later they went to the cinema together, and from the photo I was emailed this afternoon I can deduce they were in the Victoria Square Shopping Centre. After the film they went for tapas. They're having a great old time.

Thomas with the dazzling Belfast city skyline.


After persuading his dad he needed hot chocolate.

Duncan's new favourite thing is his Vtech camera. He can take photos and videos whenever he wants and incorporate them into his films. He made a film a few days ago, in which he videoed a YouTube film as it played and sang along and gave a bit of helpful commentary. It's posted on his blog here. The other children have had loads of fun with the camera too, taking shots of Pippi and using the special effects to frame their faces with horns or a viking helmet. I would have loved something as cool as this when I was their age.

I'm looking forward now to the weekend as we'll be mixing it up with some of the extended family. No doubt, chocolate will be consumed too.

Kissing Maid Marian

Duncan continues to draw and make films on the computer. Usually these days, he is dressed in his short green trousers, and a green t-shirt he customised with a pair of scissors, cutting the sleeves shot and shaping the shirt bottom to medieval style zig-zags, finished off with a yellow hard hat. He got a grey fleece hat a few days ago, and asked me to "read it" (name it) and now he wants me to buy a yellow fleece hat with a bright red feather.

Many times he has presented me with the camera and asked me to take a photo "like that" as he does some move or other. It's videos he wants, not photos and I've made a dozen or so in the past few days. He takes the files and uses movie-making software to add a few effects, text and music then gets me to upload them on YouTube. A few times I've forgotten to log out of my YouTube account on his computer and he has renamed a file or deleted a film. Yesterday however he uploaded 2 films I had never even seen. He did everything in these entirely unaided.

The first is another in his Pinocchio series. He has combined screenshots and downloaded Disney images with his own pictures and set the lot to music from Disney's Dinosaur soundtrack. It seems he has been inspired by an evil Pinocchio YouTube film. He's got screen grabs of this video- I'm going to have to try explaining copyright soon! I hope the maker of that film isn't bothered by having his images used...



The 2nd film is part 10 of the Robin Hood series. In this, he's had me or someone else film him. For most of the film he's trying to kiss Lady, who he's deemed to be Maid Marian, but his hat keeps falling off. he keeps on trying, pausing only to replace the hat and wipe his mouth until he comes up with the solution. Lady and I are cracking up laughing throughout, but he decided in his wisdom to overlay a bit of Black Eyed Peas music. It's a hoot.



He gets his girl in the end.

Duncan takes over my blog

I've been caught up in efforts to stop the Action for Children demonic autism campaign (now with 625 members!)

But I must still blog as I have been ordered to do so.
The little man created another of his fine, artistic videos. He asked me to upload it to YouTube as usual, but he also asked me to help him annotate it with little speech bubbles. He's more aware of YouTubian innovations than I am!

So he provided the text and I provided my limited technical assistance and we've developed the following masterpiece. Oh, and I was also instructed to, "put it on the blog"!

He asked me to let him type a bit, so here's Duncan's post. He asked me to put his words in italics. I must get him a blog of his own.

The Rugrats are going to the jungle with dinosaurs and eggs and meat of the egg travels the desert. Must wait.
The End

So as asked, here is...Rugrats, The Return of Reptar Rex.

The day in pictures

The family ate lunch together. Even Duncan sat/stood at the table with everyone else for a while before plonking himself back down in front of his computer. It's situated just beside the dining table, so at least he was close. These simulated theme parks don't build themselves you know! Unfortunately he opted to watch films about ear wax extraction as we ate. I persuaded him to watch more Morph films first, and watch ear wax films later.
(RIP Tony Hart, a source of joy and inspiration to so many.)

Lady started to work on a volcano kit she'd been given as a gift ages ago. The boys gathered to watch and participate. Duncan was alarmed at the idea of an explosion in the kitchen. I was able to explain that it isn't a real volcano, just a little pretend one for children. He donned the plastic safety glasses and helped with the first activity, a basic demonstration of the effects of coloured water on a mixture of citric acid and sodium bicarbonate. He was impressed, the others were a bit underwhelmed. Next they painted the volcano case and we've left it to dry in preparation for a demonstration of the stunning power of our planet.

The weather wasn't too bad so we headed off to the playground for a while. Duncan ran the length of the tennis courts, throwing his orange "Green Eggs and Ham" book into the air several time. He told me he was doing "the egg travels" and though I don't know the scene he means (from Disney's Dinosaur), I trust his interpretation. Lady did gymnastics moves and pushed her brothers fast in the spinning bowl thing. They have an uncanny tolerance for rotational movement.

Thomas does effortless gorgeousness.

Duncan revs up the spinning bowl thing before launching himself inside.

Pippi waits patiently while her pack frolics.

It has been another good day.

Creating films

Gordon thought of the perfect career for Duncan. He could be a film editor. He'd get to sit at a computer, in a quiet room, and use his brilliant eye for detail and technical abilities. His peculiar overall vision might bring him into dispute with the director though!

OK, I know I'm just spouting and getting way too far ahead of things. But no matter what happens when he's an adult, he's certainly enjoying making films now. Over the past few days he's churned out about 10 films using Windows Movie Maker. He imports a piece of music and a selection of images, some he created from scratch, others he copied from the web and a few that he copied and then customised. He drags each component into place, precisely and in a carefully designed order. Then he adds credits or titles, choosing the text font and style and colour scheme. He types his own text. He adds effects. He may ask me for help in finding a certain effect. Yesterday he called me over, pointed to the image on screen and said, "make it..." as he closed one eye and moved right up to the screen. He didn't have the words to say that he wanted to see the picture "ease in" but now he does. He has learnt how to fade in and out, pan across, and has experimented with other effects. He publishes and saves the film. Then he calls me over and asks me to complete the final stage, upload his masterpiece onto my YouTube channel, letting him type in his choice of title. I think he needs his own channel!

I've added 7 of his films in the past few days. Most of them use Justin Timberlake's "Cry me a river" song; he wanted to use the Black Eyed Peas "Phunk it" but YouTube kept blocking the audio for breaching copyright. Obviously, people will choose to watch Duncan's peculiar little videos rather than pay for a CD or download(!) He's also used the theme music from Disney's Dinosaur film-I expect that'll be blocked eventually too. He loves to watch the films he made on YouTube alongside all his favourites, featuring BBC idents and various logos, Rugrats, Tots TV and Thomas characters.

I think this one is my favourite as it's got more of his own pictures. These guys are from Kinder Eggs, the blue haired fella with the sad face is Oliver, who features heavily in Duncan's work and his friend with purple hair is Siver. There's a nice image of the pair fishing beside their farm house, with a pig in a fence just behind them.

A sense of style

Lady has cared about how she looks for a long time. Since she was a toddler she has chosen most of her outfits though often when she was younger, she'd mix it up in clashing colours that had me rolling my eyes and envying her nice, neat, pristine and coordinated friends. But I usually let her make that decision, knowing there were plenty of other battles that I had to win. As she's grown, she has developed a cool and easy style and always looks good. She's so different from myself at her age, when I had no confidence about clothes and hated shopping, worrying about what my friends might think about what I wore, and just having no idea what looked good on me.

Thomas too likes to dress to impress, and gave me shopping instructions for the Big Family Christmas Party we're going to on Sunday; black trousers and a button down shirt. He's not gone too far into junior meterosexual territory yet, hasn't asked for hair gel or anything, but he makes an effort now and then.

So far, Duncan has only worried about clothes when he's been dressing up. Then he'd pull together a look using stuff from his dressing up box, but also the drawers and wardrobes of all the family, if he thought it fit the part.

But when we were in Florida, I was buying tops for the children, and he picked a couple that he wanted. One was a Spiderman shirt printed with a picture of a rippling chest, which looks so funny on his skinny frame. But hey, he wanted that one. He also chose a bright Disney shirt and has worn it often since we got home.

I've usually laid an outfit out for him each morning, but more often than not he wears what he wants. Recently there was another new development. We were in the supermarket, home to dough-nuts, sweets, crisps, DVDs and toys and so full of temptations for a boy like Duncan. He looked at these in turn, chose a packet of gum, examined as usual the case of the much wanted but at the same time feared Dinosaur DVD, then said, "go see boy's things" and walked off to the clothes section! I wasn't expecting that. He liked the look of shirt/waistcoat combo, saying it was a "Lord of the Rings top." (Lady's just explained why; he's seen clips of the Hobbits on YouTube.) But he opted instead for a stripped and very handsome looking shirt, and a Superman T-shirt. Now he has a special outfit for the party too.

I just need to think about what I'll be wearing now. I can't let my fashionable children down.

Lap it up

Duncan has decided that he likes to drink milk, lots of milk. However it has to prepared as in the Disney film The Aristocats. He pours the milk into a bowl, adds a sprinkle of cinnamon, a dash of vanilla extract, a smidgen of sugar and a dollop of double cream, then he blasts it in the microwave. On a few occasions he placed the bowl on the floor and lapped it with his tongue, but realising it's an inefficient way for a human to consume their vittles, he went back to the more traditional method. Once, perhaps inspired by the relish with which the cartoon cats dinned on the concoction, he made a large portion up for our dog Pippi. She tried it, but didn't like it and I poured it away explaining that dogs don't like milk, just people and cats. "And cows," said he.

Lady's friend from next door has been to stay with us for a few nights. The girls enjoyed spending lots of time together, with late night chats and lots of time spend enjoying such pre-teen delights as the Jonas Brothers and HSM (if you don't know the acronymn, you'll not care) on YouTube.

Best of all, Lady went with her friend to a school disco on Friday evening. The pair got all dolled up, Lady wearing a bit too much silvery eye shadow, so it fell under her eyes, panda fashion. A quick wipe sorted her out and off they went to face the music. I was told afterwards, that 3 boys had asked my 10 year old child to dance. Oh my. Is this the beginning of a new phase? Will I know how to strike a balance between allowing her freedom to have fun, make new friends and enjoy her journey towards adulthood with protecting and sheltering her and teaching her to make safe choices. Ah well, she's still very young. I'll just take it as it comes.

Thomas was a bit put out that he wasn't able to go dancing too. He rocks the joint when he's dancing in his room, not that he knows I've seen him. He asked "why do the girls get to go to the ball, and I don't?" So endearing! My sister pointed out the Harry Potter connection; school balls instead of discos. To make it up to him, I took him to the soft play area this afternoon and he ran himself ragged while I supped tea and read, so different from when Duncan's there too. Duncan whiled the afternoon away by lounging in the bath (the boy has at least one a day) and checking out cuckoo clocks on ebay. He's got his eye on one that costs over £200. I bid on a couple but didn't go quite high enough so I still have to get one from somewhere before Christmas. And he's very particular about what it must look like and how it must perform. Bum. At least I won a Lego Spiderman so perhaps that'll distract from any potential clock deficit.

RCT3

Duncan is really into his Roller Coaster Tycoon PC game. He's been trying for ages to recreate some of the Disney World/Land rides, in particular, Space Mountain. He kept showing me YouTube videos of these amazing versions of the rides, and bugging me to download them for him. I didn't know how or where to get the sets from. He's been going onto the Atari forums and scrolling through the posts. He showed me a few topics that seemed to help. It took me ages to piece together what I had to do though. It's not bad, what he managed to achieve. He typed his request, and found the relevant pages. He managed to read enough (and find the right images) to know when he was on the right track. He has tried so hard to make the coasters by himself, and he has designed some fabulous scenery, including a great version of Expedition Everest, with snow topped mountains and all. He has a great feel for how to use the program, how to build the walls and change the landscape. It's quite astonishing really.

Since I finally figured out where to get the set of files he needed to build Space Mountain (Mission 2) I helped him get the files in place. He asked me to help connect the multiple pieces, so I gave it a go. He was very disappointed with my efforts. I was sent away and he got to work himself. He kicked my ass at the game, building a beautiful, synchronised version of the ride using the well designed scenery of someone kind enough to share his work online.

I downloaded Google Sketchup (a cool, free 3D modelling program) and let him go to work, after spending a couple of minutes showing him some basic techniques. He knew what to do and had some ideas to try out instantly. The boy's got skills at stuff like that. Perhaps it'll develop into something marketable some day, but for now, he's learning loads through his interests and enjoys them. That's good to see.

Get outta the pool

It was just too cold. We managed to stay in for about 5 minutes. Duncan had me pull him around, going from side to side (good arm work out) and Lady obliged to play the role of the crocodile leading to squeals of delight when she closed in. But suddenly he climbed out and headed, hunched and shivering, to the stand of showers. I turned the shower on and he stood under. Thomas joined us, then Lady came to complain at being left alone. The boys wouldn't get back in. I told Lady I'd take her swimming one evening without them.

So we get dressed again and as I leave, I tell the man at reception that the water in the learner pool felt colder than usual, he said he'd look into it. It's probably just because the air temperature is so low. Well, it was a heck of a lot of effort for 5 minutes of swim time.

I'll have to find us another activity until the weather improves round here.

Odd stories

Last autumn, Duncan had a Kinder Surprise egg, and the toy inside was a blue alien, at the time known as "Japanese boy."

Unfortunately, he lost the toy and we bought many, many more eggs always hoping to find another. We never found the blue one, only a couple of his siblings/colleagues. But a few weeks ago, Duncan showed me an Ebay listing for the much sought after blue alien toy. Can you imagine that there are people out there selling the junk toys found inside Kinder eggs? But then, mugs like me come along and buy them. Yes, I forked out good money for this thing, and was glad I did as it made my boy so very happy.

Since then, it's been renamed. The blue alien is now known as Oliver Companies, and his mates are Roger and Siver. They get up to all sorts of japes, some of which involve Thomas the Tank engines, Super Mario and his brother, as well as rascal eighties kids TV star, Tiny from Tots TV.

Duncan asked me to make a few books about them. Today he helped me make a film about the books. The stories are, um...original. Anyway, they make me smile.

Raider of the Brown Package

I've had better mornings.

There was a knock at the door, and I spied the postman through the glass. Thinking he had a parcel or something to be signed, I opened the door and saw Duncan standing alongside him.

I had seen him only a few minutes earlier. The front door was locked, but he had obviously gone out unnoticed through the garage, left open after Lady fed her guinea pigs.

Postie asked, "Is he your son?" I was tempted, but honesty won, "Yes. Is everything all right?"

"He was trying to get into my van. He was trying to get a parcel"

Oh shit. Look sorry, I know I don't swear here (often) but sometimes it's apt. He must have been scooting up and down the street until he noticed the van parked at the top of the road.



(Duncan muttered, "Get Ertl break-down train in brown parcel.")

"Oh no, I am so sorry! Was anything damaged?

"No, but he wouldn't listen to me when I told him not to."

"Look, he's autistic, he didn't understand. I'm really sorry."

"Now if anyone sees him getting into the van they could call the police. The police would get involved."

What! I've just told you he's autistic, he's a little kid, he thought there was a toy in there for him, you're a big man, you can keep him out. And surely you lock the bloody van when you're not in it! Get the police involved! Like they have nothing better to do than write up reports on small disabled boys.

"I understand. I'm sorry."

That's it, just suck it up. I should have known for sure where he was, the little Houdini.

"Just talk to him will you, try to explain that he can't do that."

"Yes I will, sorry."

When he went I glowered at the child and gave him a stern talking to. I know he likes post vans; I've seen him look up Google images for Royal Mail van. But it was still an unexpected transgression, not something I'd known I'd have to prevent.

He was very worried at the mention of the police, which he'd overheard and asked repeatedly that the "police not take Duncan away." I reassured him that he was safe, that the police help children, and they only take away very bad big men and women.

I was glad to be getting out that afternoon. I took the children, including cousin A. on the train to see their Granda and G in Belfast. I dumped them on the grandparents (such good people as they are) and snuck out to meet Gordon for a late lunch. Oh the bliss of being away from all the little darlings for a while. We went to Japanese place called Sakura and had fantastic sushi for next to nothing. Lovely!

Meanwhile, the children had a BBQ and went to the park, although Duncan refused to leave the car having decided that he needed to go to the toy shop.

Home later, to a puppy delighted to see her pack return.

Aloof and lacking empathy?

The picture shows me wearing a happy expression, as well as a few hearts, a flower (I think it's a lilly like those in a vase on our table) and most endearingly of all, a flag from a railway signal box.

Duncan made it and handed it to me last night, entirely unprompted, after I'd been giving out to someone for something. I was at the time, being a bit of a grumpy mum. He told me he'd made a card.

You know those autistic children and their legendary "aloofness" and "lack of empathy". You know how often they're described as being "locked in their own little world".

Look at that picture and see the evidence, that those theories, are utter bollocks.

Springtime news

Duncan has found a new form of artistic expression; modelling clay. We bought a few blocks of stuff that can be baked and he got to work. The first time I over cooked and blackened it but since then we've got the hang of it and now Duncan can make and bake his sculptures (with supervision). All these he made from memory.

This is one of the first things he made. It's Po from the Teletubbies. Of course, observant people will have known that just by looking at the little telly in the tummy.












Then he made a model of the train from the Disneyland Paris's Big Thunder Mountain train.


He made Casey Jr, the train from Dumbo.







The next item, he told me, is a "mometer, like in Madagascar." I thought it was some sort of snake from the film, so asked for further clarification. "It's a mometer, for medicine. Like Melman in Madagascar." Oh, it's a ther-mometer. He has since learnt the correct pronunciation of the word, having practised it many times.




But my favourite, is the EasyJet aeroplane. He has the wings, engines, tail and even the writing on the side; esy jet!



We've been enjoying the warmer weather and spending much more time outdoors. Lady took the camera out and snapped her brothers playing. I love the picture of Duncan, in which you see Lady's reflection in the window and the weird looking shot of Thomas looking like an alien, with Lady reflected in his eyes!











Further news on the dog question; our local animal sanctuary, where we got our 2 guinea pigs, have decided not to let us adopt one of their dogs because we home educate and have not had dogs before. They don't see how I could find the time to look after a dog when I am so involved with my children. It's ridiculous. There are all these dogs who are put to sleep all over Ireland daily, and they could ensure at least one gets a chance at a home but irrational prejudice prevents it. I explained to them that HE usually takes no more time than parenting a school child, who needs to be dropped off and lifted from school as well as packed lunches prepared, uniforms readied, supervision of homework, attendance at school meetings, and often helping out in the classroom or on school trips.
Thankfully, another rescue organisation has approved our application so I hope we'll find a good canine match through them.

Other family news; Thomas and Lady have new bikes, and Duncan will get his at the weekend. Neither Thomas nor Duncan had ever ridden a proper two wheel bike before. They have been bombing about on a cheap little trainer bike that has two wheels but no pedals, just getting the hang of balancing and steering it. It wasn't much of a surprise when they both mastered riding the proper bike within 3 minutes! So I took them to the park yesterday to have a good long ride each and to learn how to use the brakes properly. They did great!

Some decadent days

We went to my brother's house in Leitrim for Easter. Lady and Thomas played with their cousins, Lady mostly played up with 6 year old C. and Thomas with 4 year old E. They get on really well together. Duncan preferred to ride a trike around outside. He had a notion to buy a toy bow and arrow (or "boanarro" as he wrote on his first trial on Google) and didn't really accept my explanation that toy shops are closed on Easter Sunday. Well, copious quantities on chocolate helped settle everyone, and we adults enjoyed good food, a few drinks and much chat.

Lady and Thomas stayed for 3 extra nights with their cousins, which was, by all accounts, a very successful event. They went swimming in a super duper, waves and slides pool, then they all won medals in some children's races at a 10k race my SIL ran. The village they live in seems to be populated by a strange breed of Irish folk who all run. Well, there are worse vices than could inflict them.

It was odd having just one child. Gordon and I took Duncan into Belfast on the train. We visited the Disney store to buy his much wanted bow and arrow toy, then we ate at Nandos in the newly opened and very posh Victoria Square shopping centre. Duncan was marvellous. He had his shouty moments. He always does, but so what. He was as happy as a boy can be on the train. Watching him, we talked about how fantastic we think he is, and how glad we are to have him. Having autism enter our lives was unexpected, unwelcome at first (before I figured out that autism=Duncan, which is obviously all good) and something that shook us right up, leading us to make choices in nearly every aspect of our lives that we might otherwise not have made.
But mostly, Duncan is just so blinkin' adorable, with his big eyes, his big tooth, his curls and all his games.

Duncan too had a night away from home at my dad's apartment, leaving we adults home alone. We ate out that evening, and then to be even more decadent, went out again for breakfast. In the afternoon we all drove around to pick up the travellers, so had our wee family back together again.

Since then, I can't quite remember what we've done. Lady went to a holiday activity scheme at a leisure centre a few times with her friend from next door. The children's usual classes and activities were off for the school holidays, so even though we're home-educators, the children were in holiday mode and we were (even) more disorganised than usual.

I do remember yesterday though. It was our 12th wedding anniversary. I don't know how that's even possible seeing as I'm still 24... My dad and step-mum took the children for a few hours and Gordon and me went for lunch at the Mourne Seafood Bar in Belfast. Rather romantically, among the songs playing softly in the background, was what we choose for the first dance at our wedding party. (OK, pass the sick bucket!) More importantly, the food was fabulous, and it's somewhere we'll definitely be back to.

My youngest brother and his family had also come up to Dad's place, so we enjoyed seeing them for the first time since his baby's christening. Both Thomas and Duncan were delighted with baby D, sitting beside him stroking his little head, though Duncan was a bit worried about D's touch of cradle cap, saying he had to sort the 'creepy crawlies', referencing what I tell the boys when I'm checking them over for nits!

So it's back to normal today, or at least what passes for normal here.