3 Jul 2009

Run Away to Germany

Duncan was, as he was kind enough to let me know, sad and angry. He was in his bed and hiding his tear streaked face in my arms as I held him and stroked him. I was both the source of his pain and hopefully, his comfort. I had told him off sharply for running about upstairs when it was way past bedtime and the others were trying to sleep. I'd been up and down the stairs many times trying to settle him and then I just snapped, said loudly he was being a bad boy and I had hurt his feelings.

He told me that he didn't love me and that "Mummy is a bad woman." Well, if I thought it was OK to say to him...

I said I was sorry for making him sad and for shouting at him. He wasn't ready to forgive too soon. He sobbed, "Duncan hates Mummy...Duncan loves Mummy."

Poor boy.

I acknowledged his confusion and said that I love him and that he is so sad and cross now and he will feel better later. He agreed that he would be "happy tomorrow."

He lay quietly for a while but it must have come to mind again and he burst out, "put my shoes on!"

I asked where he wanted to go. "To the airport."
How will you get there? "In the taxi. I will bring small Superman case."
Do you want to fly somewhere? "Duncan will go to Germany. Mummy will stay at home."

I did feel like laughing at his rebellion, but hugged him a bit tighter (which he likes), kissed his curls and told him he could go to Germany some day. Soon enough he lay quietly and I left him.

This morning I mentioned his planned trip and he said he wants to go with Mummy and Daddy and Lady and Thomas. When I started saying something else about our night time conversation he instructed me to drop it; "don't say it."

He's been interested in going to Germany and especially the Black Forest for a while now, ever since he started his interest in cuckoo clocks and watched films about their manufacture, often in German. I think one day we'll go there. Perhaps if we're in the country, we can call in to see the fabulous Gonzo.


jazzygal said...

Oh...poor baby. They sure know how to push our buttons though don't they... then they break your heart when they say you've hurt their feelings. And, oh yes...it is SO hard to not laugh when they make their confounded counter-arguments! I get into such trouble trying to hold it in.... as to actually laugh would be the worse thing to do!

happy Birthday by the way! x J

Grannymar said...

Being a mother is the most wonderful gift in the world, but sometimes it is very hard work. Hang in and hug plenty!

I like Duncan's choice of destination, if he waits until I get my new hip, I'll come too!

Socrates said...

Yes, visiting the Gonzo is a must...

Gonzo said...

That's so sweet!

Duncan's most welcome of course, although, I've no cuckoo clock, but some cheap thing made in China.
But at least we share a love for the Rugrats.
I've still got a nice collection of wind up Rugrats figures that came with Burger King Kids menus many years ago.

Gonzo said...

*Oops, I mean the *whole* family is welcome of course!

Lisamaree said...

Genius. And he is totally right. Best way to avoid a major falling out with a loved one - go on a trip.

Anonymous said...

Cute kid. Makes me want to have a family of my own. :-)

- American Patriautistic Adult

Sharon McDaid said...

@jazzygal, thanks for the birthday wishes.
I've helped him label feelings from before he could talk. I think it's helped him accept and understand all these emotions.

@Grannymar, you are so right! And sure maybe we'll get a bus load going.

@Socrates, so how about if we go to eastern England? You wanna join us for a McDonalds?

@Gonzo, haha, never fear. It'd be rather cruel of me to launch my full gang on you. We can be a noisy lot. But then, you can probably handle our racket better than most.

@Hammie, he's not so slow. He had a new one the other night, again he was cross and he was telling me so. Then he mouthed a word, as if practicing how it felt in his mouth then he said, "I'm so indignant!"
What a star.

@anon, thanks for reading and commenting. He sure is cute kid. There are some not so cute moments but definitely the cuteness wins.

Socrates said...

Absolutely, and we'll get Prof. Double-Barreled to come along too...