27 Nov 2006

Good and bad

Over the past few days, I've listened to a lot of wailing, at high volume, produced by a small boy right next to my head. It's been awful at times. He has been upset about so many things. I have not coped at all well with this. I've been horrible sometimes, and have gotten so wound up by all the noise and aggravation, that its all escalated until we've ended up clinging to each other, both in tears. I need to buy some ear plugs. He hates to see me cry or be sad; he wipes my eyes and says 'no Mummy sad, Mummy just happy' which always does help me smile again.

But, even through all this, there have been some wonderful developments and experiences for all 3 children. Duncan has been reading a little booklet I made him, complete with pictures, showing how I'd bought him a train on Ebay, and describing how the man in the train shop would parcel and post it, then the postal worker would deliver it. He loves it! He keeps carrying it round with him and reading it over and over. I have to improve the little pictures a bit every so often too; he'll stare at one for a while, then ask me to, for example, draw in a wooden floor, complete with knots in the wood, or the bricks in the wall of the house picture, alternating bricks in brown and orange. It's so important to him to get it right, and he works so hard finding the words to communicate what's in his head.

His ability to read has taken a huge leap forward over the past few days too. I remember someone telling me that it seemed her child became more difficult to deal with when he had a surge in ability with some other skill; perhaps that's what is happening here. Anyway, he has been pointing to each word, reading it clearly, skipping the few words he doesn't know yet, and carrying on with the story. I have never seen him do this before, he never seemed to recognise that they were all individual words before. Gordon watched him with me on Friday, and was so proud of him (and a bit misty eyed too!)

The big news for Thomas, is he now wears glasses. He is slightly short sighted and really only needs to wear his new glasses for stuff like watching TV. Thomas is so proud of then though, that he wears them all the time. In fact, he's decided to start sleeping on the bottom of their bunk beds, so he can get into bed, pull his duvet over himself, and then finally, he removes the glasses, puts them carefully into their case and places it on his chest of drawers.

He walked around on Friday and Saturday, with a zig-zag scar drawn on his forehead, so he looks more like his hero, Harry Potter.

On Friday night, he and Lady both spent the night at their friends house. It was a sleep over for his 12th birthday, and there were, oh, about 20 or so children sleeping there. Thomas was so excited when I'd told him he would be staying, and immediately went to pack his bag. He had a great time, hanging out with his best little buddy, and apparently, he's a dab hand with these DS electronic games now too!

Lady loved it too. They watched a bunch of exciting movies, and she slept with the 2 big girls also staying over. The best bit, she told me, was when she and another girl, were on an exercise bike belonging to D (the very brave Mum hosting this whole gang). They both raved about chocolate birthday cake, pizza and pop, and were all fast asleep by 7.30 the following night. Thanks D!

(Update, the new 'Daniel's Trevor engine' has just arrived in the post, exactly as described in our story! Hurrah!)


The Jedi Family of Blogs said...

I've been there, with the screaming child, believe me, & I have screamed right back, to my great shame... The first summer after B developed the OCD was so out of control- I had so much to learn & new, outre behaviours to get used to & it was sometimes just too much. I always found a way to apologise to B, let him know that I'm a human being & trying my best (in a non-guilt-trippy way, I sincerely hope...), & that's the only way I found to salvage things & try to forgive myself. Things got better...

We have also had the experience of B becoming unsettled as he masters new skills, resulting in outbursts.

Oh, & Harry! B has been in love with HP since he was 5. I found him a pair of play HP glasses & he wouldn't take them off either, with scar on forehead. Then they mutated into Clark Kent glasses & Milo (from Atlantis) glasses- when he was 5-6 he rarely left the house out of costume, of one sort or another :) He has finally outgrown all of the HP & Jedi robes & wasn't interested in replacements (sob) until just a couple weeks ago when he requested we make him some wizard robes of his own designing... hooray!!

kristina said...

Charlie can sense me getting angry or anxious without me saying a word----I try to be "Zen" (if that makes sense) and just let it go. Something learned after too much practice over the years! Charlie has not gotten "into" Harry but when he wore wire-rimmed glasses, every kid thought he looked like him!

I agree entirely, there is always something good that happens.

Anonymous said...

I love the bit about you making a book for Duncan :-) Glad his train showed up!

We noticed difficulties with new skills back when our son was very, very small. Even as an infant he would go through sleep problems and wailing misery until it seemed he's wake up one morning and WOW, he could suddenly do something new and was his old merry self again :-) He still does this, though it's become less dramatic with time.

Sharon McDaid said...

Lisa, I know exactly what you mean. One thing that always surprises me about all 3 children, is their hue capacity for forgiveness. They are well practised, and they really know that I'm no superwoman. I wish I didn't shout so much, I mean, what am I teaching when I'm roaring 'just stop shouting at me!'

I look forward to seeing the completed wizard robes.

Kristina, I really need to develop some mastery of zen. I can let so much wash over me, but when my variable tripping point is reached, I react.

MIT, guess what, yesterday was a much calmer, happier day. We made a new copy of his 'Trevor' book together on the computer, using photos and Google images. It looks really good!